My parents bought me a book as a kid filled with fables and parables for children. I still have it. I still read it. The sun and the wind was my favourite story. Is my favourite story. The sun and the wind had a competition with each other of who was the strongest. The aim was to get the shepherd to take off his cloak. Whoever could get him to take his cloak off was the strongest, most powerful, influence. The wind blew hard, it was like a hurricane. Strong, then cold, icy wind. The wind tried everything. Constant steady stream. Violent outbursts. Just wind alone. Or wind with leaves, stones and sticks that could hurt the shepherd. The wind thought he could blow the cloak off with his fierceness. It didn't work. The shepherd wrapped it around himself more tightly. The sun on the other hand shone brightly and quietly. Not intensely to parch, but just to warm. Progressively warming the shepherd up til he eventually took his cloak off. The sun won by not doing a lot, but just shining bright quietly. Moral of the story: you can have a better influence to change with kindness, than with aggression.
But you've got to be intentional about being authentic. It can't be put on, coz we can all smell a try-hard 10km off.